What Makes a Human Human

By Mary Keating

My classmates scribble
down our law professor’s words
as if he’s the second coming
Not me. I close my eyes,
relax in my wheelchair 
Listen as he expands our minds to grasp
what makes a table a table
Is it the number of legs? What about a dog?
What if the dog only has three legs?


My body tenses
as it senses
where he’s heading
Eyes wide open when he asks:

“What makes the handicapped dog different
than the real dog?”

His words slam
into my solar plexus
leaving me cold 
cocked, breathless, shocked


The scribbling scribes don’t stop
Don't pause. Don't see
how these words diminish me


I can’t hear outside my head anymore
I don’t know if anyone answers. The bell
must have rung like it’s rung at the end
of every class. The students pack their packs,
drift away just like any other day
while I stay alone with my professor


I want to cry out
Call him out
But my lips are shut
My lungs deflated


Familiar choruses repeat inside my head:

You are not worthy
You are not our equal

I remember:

My high school principal telling me  
it was impossible for me to return after my accident
And when I figured out how, I endured being
stuffed into the stink of the cafeteria elevator,
its decomposing slop attaching daily to my wheels


Living on college campus—I had to go 
home to take a shower because the bathrooms
weren’t designed with me in mind


Not one law school dorm room is accessible
I live segregated across the street  

Relegated to back door entries
Barred from buses, boats, subways,  
automobiles, trains, airplanes, 
bathrooms, banks, bars, stores,
office buildings, restaurants, 
hospitals, doctor’s offices, dentists 

 

Every curb, every step, every design 
that doesn’t acknowledge
my humanity keeps trying to erase me

They all stem from a thoughtless thought 

The hollow inside my body 
becomes the bowl of a bell
My professor’s words that strike 
me, the mallet  
expounding astounding wrongs
that keep resounding until I crack

No matter the pain,
the sheer weariness,
my voice must be heard

I turn sorrow
into a liberty song


Swelling with each breath
rising from my depths, soaring 
past my lips, I ring out clear and strong:

I am here
I am real
I belong


Mary Keating (she/her), a graduate of Manhattanville College and Yale Law School, works at her own law firm in Darien, CT. When she’s not practicing law, she’s usually writing. Recently, her poetry has appeared in New Mobility magazine, Scribes*Micro*Fiction, Wordgathering, and in various publications on Medium.com. An advocate for disability rights, she loves to share her experiences as a disabled person and wheelchair user. Mary lives in Connecticut with the love of her life, her husband Dan.

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The Cat-Walker